I'd just finished making love to my beautiful wife Jennifer in our king-sized bed. Her head on my chest, she gently sucked at my right nipple as I stretched my arms and legs in relaxed bliss. 'What's wrong with this picture?' I thought to myself. 'Not a damned thing', I answered. For the last four years at least, I had spent each and every week-end morning at the office. This day was the rare exception. Once again, my thoughts turned to the juicy personal injury settlement I'd concluded the day before, basking in the glory of a legal job- well-done, and the nearly three quarters of a million dollar attorney fee I had earned. Between my latest legal triumph and my wife's sexual attentions, I felt myself unusually energized.
My wife Jennifer and I had married while still in college. After law school, I had decided to risk it all and open my own practice. After years of contending with angry bill collectors, flaky paralegals, bitter clients, obnoxious judges, and tight-fisted insurance companies, I'd finally built my personal injury practice into a real winner; my multi-million dollar pride and joy. Unlike many of my colleagues in the law biz, I didn't drink, I didn't chase my secretary, and I didn't speculate on long-shot investments. I'd built my castle in the sky brick-by-heavy-brick and right now, naked in bed with my wife for the first Saturday morning in ages, I felt like the king himself.
"Honey?" "Honey," Jennifer softly purred as she ran her wet, velvet tongue through my chest hair, bringing me from my private reverie into the one I shared this morning with her.
"This is so wonderful. I hope it's the start of a new you. You've been making so much money lately and it's really about time you cut back."
"But Jen, I do it all for you guys." She was right. It was wonderful.
"I know. You're a fabulous man," she added, smooching my chest.
"I love you and Andrea and I want you to have everything you need. It's important to me. My own needs come second. Family first," I said.
"Family first, huh? You're right, Jonathan, it is important. But as hard as it is to believe, women don't live by shopping alone. They eventually come home from the Mall and when they do, they like to share themselves with the man in their life. That means you, if you didn't know."
She ran her tongue straight down the center of my body, through my bellybutton, and beyond. At times like this, my wife brought to me the raw realization that I had in fact suppressed my own physical needs.
"I have to admit, Jenny, this is very, very nice."
"So Counsel," she gravely intoned, "for neglect of your family, the Court sentences you to spend the next three hours in bed making love to your beautiful wife, after which you will take her to an early dinner, followed by a moonlight walk."
"But Jennifer, it's cloudy outside. There's no moon tonight."
"Just for that, the Court finds you in contempt and orders you not to make love to your wife, but to fuck your wife; vigorously, Counsel."
Jennifer slyly took my now-thickening penis into her mouth and started that wonderful friction of hers, just beneath the tip, making wet sounds with every tap of her tongue. My shapely wife had that dangerous combination of marvelous technical expertise in bed, coupled with an appetite for non-stop fornication. I'd frequently worried about how she'd managed to survive during my long hours at the office. I'd also given myself many pats on my lawyerly back for finding the mental discipline to spend those long hours away from her. Right now, however, she was taking me into her mouth and into her world of pleasure and the attorney in me suddenly turned over his control in favor of his penis.
We made love well into the afternoon, in virtually every room of the house, finally losing consciousness together in a tangle of sweaty, cum-smeared limbs. When I awoke, it was darker and I was in an unfamiliar place. The first thing that came into focus was the beautiful face of my fifteen year-old daughter Andrea, leaning against the doorway to the bedroom, arms folded across her chest.
"My, my," she said, then turned abruptly, whipping her long wavy blonde hair as she disappeared from sight into the hallway.
I thought I was having an out-of-body experience. Then, as my wife stirred next to me, I suddenly realized that we'd made love in Andrea's bed and had forgotten about the time.
"Jen, what are we doing here?" "What time is it?"
"Gosh, honey, I guess we got carried away."
Jennifer called out to her daughter as she slid off the bed to her feet, "We're sorry. We didn't expect you back so soon." Jennifer skipped into her daughter's bathroom, turned on the light and wrapped herself in a blue bath towel. I watched her through the open door, as she checked her face in the mirror and straightened her shoulder-length blonde hair. Even after hours of love-making, my thirty-four year old wife looked stunning.
I wrapped myself in the pink sheet from my daughter's bed and followed Jennifer out into the hallway. My daughter Andrea walked stiffly past us, entering her room.
"You guys! Who's going to clean up this mess?" she said from her bedroom.
"We're sorry, Andrea," said Jennifer. "I thought you were staying at Melissa's house all day."
I was still in a daze, wrapped in a bed sheet, leaning against the hallway and feeling like a giant spider had sucked out all of my previously abundant energy, right through my genitals.
"Yeah, well Mom have you checked the time? It's 6:30 at night."
Andrea emerged from her room and leaned against the hallway wall, arms folded, eyes straight ahead.
"We're really sorry, Andrea. You sleep in the guest room tonight," said her mother.
"Yeah, baby. We really blew it," I chimed in, trying to say something that made logical sense to me. It was hard to come up with an argument a typical father would say at a time like this.
"Some example you guys are setting," said my daughter, eyes to heaven as she whirled away down the hall. "I mean I almost never get to see you, Daddy, and when I do, I see all of you."
My wife and I exchanged a shy grin and went back to our room.
The next morning, my wife pulled me out of bed, pushed me into the shower, and ordered me to put on a sport coat but no tie. She met me in the living room with my daughter Andrea. Both my wife and daughter were nicely dressed, made-up, and ready to go out.
"Andrea," said my wife, "your father doesn't realize it yet, but he is not going to the office today. I know that Sunday is a normal working day around here for the menfolk in our family. But today, and from now on, your father is going to spend every week-end with us." My wife Jennifer turned to me with a big smile, "family first, right?" as she poked my ribs, prodding me toward the door.
"Where are we going," I asked.
"Brunch," said both of my beautiful womenfolk.
We went to an elegant champagne brunch in the most expensive place in town. After all, I could easily afford it. My wife looked exceptionally gracious in a long lavender silk print dress. Jennifer was carrying the burden of conversation and spoke about how we each should open ourselves to the other, as family members, now that we would be spending more time together. She said it would be hard at first, but we had to get into the habit of tuning-in to each other's wave-length. I was half tuned-out, glancing repeatedly at my beautiful fifteen year old daughter. Rare were the times in the last four years that I'd had a chance to see her up close for more than a few fleeting seconds. She was wearing a filmy yellow sundress this morning and her long wavy blonde hair was parted in the middle and loosely tied in back. She was demurely nibbling at a piece of bacon in her slender fingers, with downcast eyes. I had always recognized the fact that she was beautiful, more so even than her mother. This morning, however, I came awake to the fact that she had blossomed into a heartbreakingly ravishing young woman.
Andrea and I had been very close throughout her childhood. Just as she had reached puberty, however, my law practice had begun to seriously flourish and I became caught up in the heady rush of professional success. I had barely seen her in years; usually on my way to and from the office, catching a glimpse of her as she was heading to some school activity, to see a boyfriend, or to go out with her best friend Melissa. Andrea knew she was beautiful, as I'm sure the dozens of boys who followed in her wake had made clear to her. At this precise moment, however, I awakened to such new discoveries as her flowing hair, her deep blue eyes, her smooth skin and its faint down, from which she radiated a soft, golden, vaporous beauty in the warm morning light. Andrea's eyes flashed briefly as they met mine, then stared without expression outside toward the sunny deck of the restaurant. I realized the little girl I had held on my knee and tucked into bed was now barely on speaking terms with me. Andrea had always been my spoiled little princess. Now, with me and perhaps with every male, she had become an ice princess; aloof, reserved, proud of her unique feminine gifts of hopeless beauty. I had forgotten just how much sexual power could reside within the body of a beautiful fifteen year old girl. 'This is my daughter,' I reminded myself. It dawned on me that I didn't quite know how I felt about her; nor how I ought to feel about myself in her presence: afraid, proud, excited, ashamed. Her eyes met mine again and bored into me without expression. This time, she held her moist gaze for at least five seconds.
"Well, are you two just going to look at each other all morning? Say something, you two. Talk to each other," said my wife.
"Edward wants me to go sailing with him this afternoon," said Andrea to her mother.
"Who's Edward?" I asked Jennifer, almost in a whisper. Andrea looked skyward.
"Edward is her boyfriend, Jonathan. Don't you know anything about your own daughter anymore? You two really have to get reacquainted," said Jennifer, nodding her head up and down.
After an awkward pause, I raised both my hands to eye level and gave them a stiff shake. "Can I say something?" I said, clearing my throat. Both women stared at me almost in surprise, giving me the floor. "I've been thinking about my life. Our lives. It's hard for me to make apologies. What I mean is that the nature of my business is, well, to never be sorry, to never give excuses, never be weak. I never give an inch," I said, slightly tapping the table with my index. "Anyway, I don't want to bore you with my business. And it is frankly boring. I realize that now. Why am I working? We have plenty of money. Jeez, I could easily retire. Is it just for the sake of winning? For whom? Looking at both of you I realize what a lucky guy I am to have two such lovely ladies in my life. So I've decided to cut back. Monday I'm looking to hire an associate, maybe a bright kid fresh out of law school, who can take over enough of my cases to give me some real free time. I want to get to know you two better. That is, if you'll let me. Anyway, that's it."
It was an excellent closing argument to a receptive jury. I had to admit to myself; I was good. Did I really believe any of it? Could I even partially turn over to someone else the child of my sweat and toil, my law practice? What made me aver something I probably didn't even feel inside? Guilt? Or was it the sudden inexplicable desire to give up anything in order to get back into my daughter's life? My head was reeling from the champagne, the summer heat, and from the intoxication of my daughter's presence. After a moment, eyes shining, Jennifer squeezed my hand in hers. "I know that wasn't easy to say, Jonathan. What do you have to say, Andrea?"
"Fine with me," said my daughter, shrugging her lovely shoulders.
"I see that you and Andrea have your work cut out for you," said my wife. "I have a great idea, though." Looking to Andrea, she said, " Melissa's Dad takes his family camping every summer, right?"
"Mr. Carbone? Yeah."
"What if he took you and Melissa camping next week-end?"
"Is Daddy coming, too?" said my daughter, again favoring me with her inscrutable stare.
"Of course he's going," said my wife. "And he will enjoy it, won't he?" said Jennifer, smiling at me broadly, jabbing her index at my nose. I smiled back, of course, my eyes at the same time catching the faint edge of a smile cross my daughter's beautiful pouting lips.
By next week's end, I had already decided not to hire a new law associate. The truth is, I liked making money and I liked the legal give and take. Much as I enjoyed my wife, she simply could not completely replace the thrill of winning that I felt in the courtroom. I wasn't about to abdicate even part of my throne to some snot-nosed law school punk. You're either in the game or you're out. How could I break it to my wife? I had practically lied in her face. Anyway, I'd freed up my schedule enough to take off at least this week-end with my daughter. She was another matter. Lately, I simply couldn't get her out of my mind.
I took off early on Friday afternoon and headed home, wondering how I felt about camping out over the week-end. Alex Carbone, Melissa's Dad was an accountant in my office building. We often spent an hour a day at lunchtime working out in the gym. It was hectic exercise but it was the only thing that helped me maintain the stamina to endure my marathon twelve-hour days in my office chair and in court. I have to admit that it also left me with not a little bit of self-pride, in my still youthful body, as well as in my self-discipline to maintain it. Mostly, though, on my drive home, I pondered how I would relate to my fifteen year-old daughter. What would I have to say to her? Would she even talk to me? Would I get those feelings of sexual stimulation that I felt around her lately? What could I do to overcome those inappropriate thoughts? 'They are extremely inappropriate, right?' I wondered to myself, almost aloud.
When I arrived home, I showered and changed into jeans and a green lumberjack shirt. My wife handed me a suitcase in which she told me she had put some spare clothes, 'just in case'. Within minutes, I went outside as Melissa's Dad pulled up in his red Jeep Cherokee with the girls and the camping equipment. They got out and I shook hands with Alex. He was a trim athletic man in his late thirties, of Italian descent, with a great olive complexion. He had that ruggedly dark, craggy demeanor of a mafia hitman and I'd often noticed the women in the gym where we worked out, looking his way. The girls were simply unbelievable and my inner voice suddenly echoed a hollow 'uh-oh', as I felt myself instantly starting to feel unfatherly feelings toward both. I could barely get up the nerve to look at them, but they were dressed in very short cut-off jeans, with halter tops, and low-cut white sneakers without socks. Melissa had the long black hair and dark complexion consistent with her Mediterranean ancestry. Where Andrea was proudly distant, Melissa was exuberant. She greeted me with a big smile and a "Hi, Mr. Tanner." In every other respect, however, both girls were bookends of pure teenage sexual beauty: long creamy legs, firm grapefruit-sized breasts, slim waists that curved so appealingly into high, rounded buttocks. As I placed my suitcase into the rear end of the vehicle, Andrea and Melissa exited our house with other suitcases. As I was about to ask them why they needed all the baggage, Andrea cracked a fleeting smile at me, saying "Just in case, Daddy," as I helped her and Melissa put them in the back end.
Alex Carbone and I rode in front; the two girls shared the back seat. They talked incessantly, their voices often descending to a low, rich tone, barely audible to me in front. After several hours of highway, we drove for about an hour along an unpaved lumberjack road. We were in the high country, in the fresh-smelling piney forest. "You girls okay?" I asked, looking back. Both girls were by now asleep, their heads resting against each other. After another one or two miles of tire-rumbling off-road driving, we arrived at the campsite. "We're here, sleepy heads" intoned Alex, evoking groans and yawns from the back seat.
Although it was mid-summer, it was a chilly night in the forest clearing among the tall timber. A light breeze whispered through the tree tops and polished the black sky, which was studded with hundreds of diamond-like stars. Alex quickly started a fire and we spread out the sleeping bags in the soft golden light. I intentionally slept in the bag as far away as possible from my daughter, Andrea. We were all quite tired, however, and I went fast asleep. After what seemed like only a few moments, I was awakened by the hollow sounds of the girls' voices. They were apparently upset. I saw them get into Mr. Carbone's vehicle in a huff, slamming the door. At the same time, I found myself swatting the air, trying to escape the buzzing onslaught of a few mosquitoes. I then saw that Alex was already up and folding the sleeping bags, stowing them into the vehicle.
"I'm sorry, Jonathan. Just a few mosquitoes. I guess it's that new dam they built up-river. They don't bother me and we have bug spray, but the girls really seem upset about 'em. We'll have to find some other place," he said, as he motioned me to come. I didn't need too much encouragement as I truly detest bugs of any kind.
"Where do we go now?" I asked, folding my bag haphazardly as I tossed myself into the front seat of the Jeep.
"I know a place further up the road. We can try it, but I haven't been there in awhile," said Alex.
"Daddy, we want to go here," said Andrea, shoving a brochure at me from the rear seat. Alex turned on the light in the Jeep and I read from it. It was an advertisement for a local mountain resort called "Peak's Inn". It offered the elegance of the city, with the restful beauty of the mountains, including swimming pools, hiking trails, horseback riding, tennis courts, and a spa and sauna, among other amenities.
"Where did you get this?" I asked her.
"Mom gave it to me, just in case."
"Just in case," I said, repeating her phrase.
"Daddy? Mr. Carbone?" Andrea leaned over, placing her elbows on my seat back, her face nearly touching mine. Her voice was suddenly softer, gentler to me than usual. "The reason why mom, my mother, made me come here was to spend more of what she calls quality time with my Dad. With you, Daddy. The point is that she just wants us to spend some time together. It doesn't really matter where. And this resort is more comfortable. I guess I'm really not the camping out type. Sorry, Mr. Carbone; Daddy." "Well, I don't know," said Melissa's Dad. "It looks kind of expensive."
"Daddy could take care of it, couldn't you Daddy. This week-end is important, especially to Mom, right Daddy?" said my beautiful blonde daughter. I could feel her sweet breath on my neck.
"Well, I don't think Mr. Tanner can afford...
"That's all right, Alex," I said.
"Daddy can afford it. Can't you?" Andrea said, almost with a touch of meekness.
"All of you, it will be my treat. Case closed," I added, in my best lawyerly tone.
In the chilly dark of that mountain clearing, in the faint light inside the Jeep, I could almost feel the warmth of my little girl's smile.
It was past 3:00 a.m. when we arrived at Peak's Inn. In the dim light of the quarter moon it appeared to be all they had advertised: modern, comfortable, with rustic charm. The night clerk regrettably informed me that they had only one room available. Further prodding and arguing on my part revealed that they had two luxury suites available on the top floor, but the cost, especially at this time of year, was rather high. I swallowed and gave my credit card. Alex and I accompanied the girls and our luggage up to the thick red-carpeted hallway of the top floor suites. We men entered one large and luxurious apartment, our daughters the other.
It was mid-morning by the time I dragged myself from one of the superking-sized beds in the room and went to the shower, admiring the massive granite fireplace along the way. I rubbed at the black stubble on my face in the mirror and was thankful that I didn't have to shave in a cold mountain stream. I guess I wasn't the camping out kind of guy either. I also stared into my own eyes, promising myself that my feelings for my daughter were just some aberration, the effect of having been a stranger to her for the last few years, also vowing to myself that I would somehow get through the day without dwelling on her physical beauty. When I was kid myself, I had always drooled over the girls of her age in high school but really had to wait until college before I encountered any real luck with females. Maybe I was just going through some crazy unresolved high school fixation. I found a handwritten note taped to the inside of the medicine cabinet:
'Andrea and Melissa are waiting for us at the swimming pool. Alex'
I showered, shaved, and put on my best pair of red swimming trunks, which my wife had conveniently packed for me, along with a yellow Hawaiian shirt and a pair of cool sunglasses. I actually felt hip and youngish, riding down in the elevator. 'This just might be fun, after all', I told myself. 'Maybe I really can use a vacation away from the old three-piece suit.'
Out at the pool, I looked for the girls and Alex. "Over here," said Alex, emerging from the hotel restaurant. "I couldn't find the girls, so I went to have some breakfast. I was starved and I hope you don't mind," he said.
I turned to him, but found my eyes drawn up to the pool area and the bare heartshaped buttocks of a young girl. She turned around and to my utter shock, I saw that it was his daughter, Melissa. She smiled at me and began walking toward me, excitedly waving her hand up and down at Andrea to get up from her lounge chair to follow. I realized suddenly that this vacation was going to be anything but fun. In fact, it was going to be the biggest intellectual challenge of my entire legal career; keeping my growing sexual stimulation at bay in the presence of my incredible daughter and her equally appealing girlfriend. Andrea and Melissa were wearing matching flesh-colored thong bikinis. The suits left almost nothing to the imagination: the back sides exposed their firm teenaged bottoms for all to see.
"Those certainly are skimpy suits," I said in my daughter's direction. "I can't believe this hotel lets you wear them, especially being minors."
"Oh Mr. Tanner," grinned Melissa, "they asked us about 'em. Andrea and I have fake I.D.s. And, you know what? They shut up when we told what rooms we were staying in. Money does talk." The girls giggled at each other.
"Jonathan," said Alex, "I can see that these girls really need a father's supervision. I think this idea of your wife's is not bad at all. Mr. Tanner and I will have a few things to say to you both. First, though, take off those suits and put on something more appropriate for fifteen year-olds."
"We'll take them off if you want, Mr. Carbone," my daughter said, crossing his arms with defiance "but we won't be wearing anything." "We don't have any other swimsuits," she offered, her nose in the air.
Alex shook his head at me. "They think they're real wild, don't they?"
"Oh Daddy," continued Melissa, "we also told the hotel something else. I hope you don't get mad."
"Honey, I won't be mad if you march upstairs right now and change into something more appropriate."
"Oh, all right," said Melissa. "But you know what? We kind of told them that, uh well..."
"We told them that we're your girlfriends," my daughter interjected, flatly interrupting her best friend. With that, the two girls pivoted around on their bare feet and headed back to their room. I caught myself watching my daughter's backside. Even the soles of her feet were attractive as hell. 'How am I going to get through this torture?' said that voice inside my head.
That afternoon, we tried to spend the type of 'quality time' that my wife had so ardently counseled to my daughter and me. We four played a little tennis, we went horseback riding along the green forest trails, and we even stopped to admire a family of deer. Throughout, I was so self-conscious of my unsettling feelings about my daughter, that I found myself talking more to Melissa than to Andrea. Andrea seemed to sense this, and withdrew from me, spending more time herself with Carbone. I partnered with Melissa at tennis and later, I helped her mount her horse. Meanwhile, Alex cracked jokes and made small talk with my daughter, who seemed to avoid my eyes, every time I tried to glance her way. Instead, she laughed at Alex' stale humor and even complimented him on his tennis game. She also frequently touched him with her hands, to get his attention, to make a point, or to respond to his humor; a privilege she had never accorded to me. Maybe Alex wasn't aware of it, but I could certainly tell that his way of looking at my own lovely daughter was every bit as intense as my own.
After our sweaty ride, we went back to our respective rooms. I showered, then settled in front of the TV when Alex answered a knock at the door. It was Melissa. She was barefoot and wearing a very short silky blue robe, obviously fresh out of the bath. Her hair was wet and combed straight back. She slipped inside and in a very meek little girl's voice addressed her father. "Daddy, can I please ask you and Mr. Tanner for a big favor? Please, oh please?"
"Sure honey. What is it?"
"Well, we were wondering. You know what Andrea and I said about telling the hotel we were your girlfriends? So they wouldn't say anything about our swimsuits?"
"Yes," said her father flatly. "What is it now?" I was already fighting back the growing tension in my stomach.
"It would be just for fun, you know. We were wondering if you and Mr. Tanner would invite us out to dinner, not here, but in a nice restaurant nearby."
"Yes. Go on."
"And that you and Mr. Tanner would, kind of, well sort of 'pretend' we were your dinner dates. Me with Mr. Tanner; and you, Daddy with Andrea. It would be just for fun. Please?"
Alex looked at me and shrugged. "I guess it can't hurt. We gotta eat, right?"
"We were also wondering, Daddy."
"Yes," said Carbone, mildly stern.
"If you and Mr. Tanner would order some flowers for us, like for real girlfriends."
I couldn't help noticing her pretty bare feet with pink nail polish and the cute way she kept rubbing one on top of the other.
"Well, honey, this is starting to sound kind of expensive. I don't know..."
"Don't worry about it," I broke in. "I'll just put it on my expense account."
"What now, honey."
"We were hoping that you and Mr. Tanner would really dress up nice. Me and Andrea have these real pretty dresses we want to wear and we want you guys to look kind of nice, too. Don't worry, Daddy, I packed your real nice suit for you. And Andrea packed something nice for you, Mr. Tanner."
"Okay, honey. Since this hasn't turned out to be much of a camping trip, I guess for once we can do more of the kind of thing you girls really prefer. Is there anything else?" said Carbone, with a tone of expectant finality.
"Well, Daddy, there is. I was wondering if, well since we're your dates and all. Sorry, 'pretend' dates. That Mr. Tanner, Jonathan, could call me Melissa and I could call him Jonathan. If that's okay." She smiled, then bit her lower lip and shrugged her shoulders as she said this, shooting me a very quick, timid glance. "And if Andrea could call you Al. She thinks you look like an 'Al' instead of an Alex. You know, like Al Pacino."
With mock exasperation, Carbone raised his eyes to a massive wood beam of the ceiling. "Is that it? Finally?"
"Well, Daddy. We were also wondering if it would be too much for you and Mr. Tanner, I mean Jonathan, to tell us that we look nice when you pick us up. You know, like on a real date? If it's not too much trouble. And maybe, kiss us on the cheek?"
"Yes? Go on. Isn't there anything more?"
"One final thing, Daddy. Our dresses are kind of, well sort of, you know. They're sexy? They're short. Please don't say anything. Oh, and you can pick us up in about three hours. Bye Daddy and thank you." She kissed her father's cheek and skipped out, but then stuck her head in the door one final time. "Oh, and Daddy, Andrea thinks you're kind of cute. You are too, Mr. Tanner, I mean, Jonathan."
Carbone turned to me, rubbing the back of his head. "I'm sorry about this, old man. What have we gotten ourselves into? I hope it doesn't set you back too much."
"No problem," I assured him. The real problem for me would involve the intellectual, moral, and 'yes' even legal issue of how to act naturally in front of my ravishing daughter, when I had such growing unnatural thoughts in my heart.
Laughing and slapping me on the shoulder, Carbone interrupted my mental cross-examination saying, "you gotta admit, though, this is kinda cute."
In exactly three hours, we called on the girls, with flowers. The door was cracked open as Alex knocked. "Are dates are here," sang Melissa's sweet voice from within. "Come in you guys." Two sets of giggles greeted us as we pushed the door open and entered. The perfume and other delicious young girl scents were thick in the air. I could already feel my palms sweat, more so than I recall having on my very first date, in fact. That date was also with a fifteen year old girl in high school named Carrie, who was so sexy to me I could barely bring myself to utter a single word all evening. Melissa's description of their dresses hadn't begun to describe how sexy these were. They were tight, they were short at mid-thigh, and they showed cleavage. The girls wore high heel pumps to match their dresses, Andrea in green and Melissa in red. Both were highly made up and their hair was styled. They each looked several years older and were even more beautiful and sexy than before, if that was possible. I felt like a rock had hit the bottom of my stomach and was making its way into my groin.
"Do you like it?" said Melissa, playing with her hair, raising it and letting it fall, strand-by- strand. "We had it styled downstairs this afternoon. Makes us look like real babes, doesn't it?" I couldn't take my eyes off Andrea's youthful breasts, which were straining to break through the sheer fabric of her green spaghetti-strap dress.
"Melissa, I think you girls have gone a bit too far," said her father. "What do you think?" said Carbone, turning to me.
I swallowed hard, as I said, "we are your fathers. As your fathers, we'll talk about this on the way back home tomorrow. For tonight, as your fathers, we made an agreement. I guess, as your fathers, we have to take you beautiful girls out after all this trouble."
"That's right, Daddy," said Andrea. "Uh, aren't you forgetting something?"
"Oh, right," I said, presenting my bouquet of pink roses to Melissa. "These are for you."
"For me? That's so sweet, Mr. Tanner, I mean: Jonathan." The soft, lilting way she said my first name sent a warm tremor down my entire body.
"She can call you Jonathan, can't she Daddy?", said my daughter, taking her flowers from Carbone.
"Daddy, aren't you going to kiss Andrea on the cheek?" said Melissa to her father. "She's your date." With a look of resignation, Alex bent to kiss my lovely daughter's cheek. I thought I caught her eyes flashing at me for a second.
"Thank you, Al, red roses are my favorite," my daughter said, putting her arm around Carbone's neck and giving him a peck on the corner of his mouth. In spite of his Sicilian olive complexion, Alex turned a dark red.
"Daddy, aren't you forgetting?" said Melissa to her Dad, who nervously plunged his hands in his pockets.
"Yes, uh, well, Andrea, you look very, very attractive tonight," said Carbone to my daughter, shifting his feet.
"Thank you," said my daughter to Carbone. "I love the way you look in that suit." Andrea then cleared her throat and flashed me a dirty look.
"Right". "Uh, Miss Carbone, Melissa, you look very nice tonight," I said.
"Daddy, what kind of a thing to say is that?" my daugther said to me stridently. "Nice?" "She looks hot and she's beautiful. She's a hot young babe, Daddy. Just because she's my best friend doesn't mean you can't be honest. Say it."
I looked apologetically at Carbone. However, right now I could refuse my daughter nothing. "You, uh, look like a very hot young lady, Melissa." My daughter shook her head, eyeing me with disgust, giving her arm to Carbone. I went through the ritual of bending toward Melissa to offer her the negotiated kiss on the cheek. However, as soon as her father's back was turned, she planted a full, red-lipsticked kiss on my lips, then playfully pushed me toward the door.
"Let's go," she chirped. "This is gonna be fun."
The girls chose a restaurant near another expensive hotel, about 10 miles down the mountain. Under the moonlight, our walk from the parking lot to the restaurant followed a small trail through the dark-green forest, passing a little silvery waterfall. Inside the place, the girls chose a rear booth. The mood was warm and romantic, with the orange-red glow of an open-hearthed fireplace, reflected off yellow pine beams and mahogany antiques. Our daughters sat in the middle of our booth, with the guys at the ends. Melissa slid up next to me while Andrea did the same with Alex. The girls soon left the table and went to the restroom. When they returned, a waiter brought champagne to our table and briskly popped it open, while our daughters giggled. Alex and I then realized they had ordered it and shown their fake I.D.s. Melissa pleaded with her father to let her have some, telling him what they were doing was just a 'one-time fun thing'. He grudgingly gave in, as long as he controlled the pouring. Of course, I went along with anything my beautiful Andrea had in mind. Soon, another bottle was brought to the table, followed by yet another. We began laughing louder and telling stories. Alex began discussing the secretary in his accounting firm, who had carpet burns on her knees every time she came from a closed-door session in his boss' office. Andrea talked about one of the cheerleaders at her school being elected to pay a special visit to the football coach to get him to lift his sanction against the team's star running back, who had been banned for drinking.
Carbone now had his arms around my daughter, showing her the Italian way to roll spaghetti on her fork. She lifted it for him to eat. He continued pouring fizzy champagne into our glasses, most of it into mine and his. Melissa was next to me, driving me crazy with the soft rustling sounds coming from her nylon-stockinged thighs, as she crossed and uncrossed her legs.
Soon, I found myself laughing into Melissa's neck and my arm around her shoulder. Her smell was intoxicating. She had slid next to me, crushing her right thigh against my left. I looked over at Andrea who was also getting very cozy with Carbone, touching his shoulder and chest repeatedly as she spoke. The girls occasionally exchanged wise and sexy little smirks. Suddenly, I felt my left hand being guided by Melissa onto the top of her smooth, nylon-stockinged thigh, right above the knee.
Glancing over at my lovely daughter Andrea, I noticed under the table that she had taken off her right shoe and that she was lightly grazing her foot along Alex's own right calf, through the grey flannel of his suit. Carbone was still laughing and telling jokes, apparently yet unaware of the growing familiarity with which he was pressing up against my daughter. Meanwhile, Melissa had placed her hand on mine, gently caressing it, still holding it on her upper thigh. It was perhaps the high altitude, the mountain air, or just the romantic setting, but I was starting to feel more than a bit intoxicated. The champagne continued flowing, and the girls were encouraging their fathers to make one toast after another: to Italy, to the Supreme Court, to Babe Ruth, to virtually every topic or joke that we had mentioned. Alex and I were doing most of the drinking by now. I was aware of moments of time slipping quickly past, with others seeming to freeze in place.
I looked over at Andrea, who was now crossing champagne glasses with Carbone, each drinking from the other's glass. In doing so, still under Carbone's right arm, she was now pressing her left breast into his chest. I turned to Melissa, who smiled sweetly at me, sighed, and rested her head on my shoulder. With her hand on mine, she now began to rub my hand along her upper thigh, back and forth, inching progressively upward, finally reaching to the edge of her very short dress. She whispered softly to me, "It's okay, Mr. Tanner, I mean Jonathan. I have dates who do a lot more than that." Suddenly, she pulled my hand further under her dress until it touched her panties. I breathlessly withdrew it and she grabbed it back, bringing it to her lips. She guided it to her left breast, lightly housed in the sheer fabric of her dress and bra. My hand lingered a few moments before I pulled it away.
I looked over at my daughter and found, to my amazement, that she herself was now resting her head on Carbone's shoulder, with her arm beneath the table in the direction of his crotch, obviously moving back and forth. Loud-mouthed Carbone had been silent now for a few seconds. Then, I saw my daughter raise her lips and kiss Carbone's chest, then move them to his neck, grazing it. She whispered in his ear and raised her lips to him. Carbone kissed them. He broke the kiss and looked over at me, with a mixture of apologetic embarrassment and excitement in his face. Under her father's eyes, Melissa chose that moment to kiss me on the lips, which was followed by my daughter kissing Carbone again, this time with much more fire. Melissa turned from watching her best friend kiss her father and reached down to my own crotch to rub it. It was at that point that I let my best judgement fly right out the window and I reached out to squeeze her breasts, kissing her with genuine passion. My mind ignited as she put her tongue in my mouth and kissed me back, hard.
I realized that Carbone and I were now openly necking with each other's fifteen year old daughter, in the back booth of a crowded restaurant. My daughter had gotten me so worked up in the last twenty-four hours, however, that I almost didn't care. After about ten minutes of heated kissing and touching, Melissa dropped her bombshell on me.
"Jonathan," she whispered into my ear, "Andrea and I are on the pill so its okay."
Suddenly somewhat sobered, I desperately tried to stop myself from holding the soft, warm, sweet-smelling teenaged flesh of Melissa, but I could no more do so than stop the massive erection that was now tenting in my pants.
Melissa cupped her hand again to my ear: "We want both of you to take us back to the hotel and fuck us." She lay her head against my shoulder and sighed.
I glanced at my daughter, who was likewise whispering into Carbone's ear, as if on cue.
The rest of our sojourn in the restaurant was a blur. I'm not sure how long we stayed, who got up first, or how I now found myself on the romantic forest path that led back to the parking lot. I had my arm around Melissa and, up ahead, Carbone was wrapped around my daughter. I bent to kiss my 'date' and found my credit card in her teeth as she giggled. Somehow, I don't think the girls were as tipsy as the fathers and they in fact led the way back to the Jeep. Carbone started singing a famous piece from the opera La Traviata, with the girls giggling and humming in accompaniment. He drove like a maniac, nearly running us off a cliff, while the girls howled with laughter. In the elevator ride up the five stories to our rooms, all four of us got very quiet. Our daughters each had their heads pressed tightly against the chests of their best friend's dad, who both held on tightly, stroking the girls' hair.
As we walked down the hall to our bedroom, Carbone and I exchanged glances. We were still sober enough to know exactly what we were getting into. I could tell from his wide-eyed look that every nerve in his body was on edge with a mixture of troubled and yet thrilled anticipation. He fumbled with his key at the lock and Andrea guided his shaking hand. My arm around Melissa, I escorted her a couple paces further down the hallway next door toward the girls' room. She came out from my grasp.
"No, Jonathan. We want to do it together, all four of us."
Melissa reached for my hand and pulled me backwards into the room with Andrea and Carbone. It suddenly hit me that what I had in store for the night was watching my beautiful teenage daughter having sex in front of me, while I got it on with her best friend. As I crossed the threshold, I hesitated. 'No contest' I decided, as I thought of seeing my beautiful Andrea naked.
The girls pushed the two over-sized king beds together. Each daughter then approached the other's father and began removing his clothes. Carbone and I made no effort to resist. We were planted like two trees, stiff and bracing for the storm. We lay back on the beds wearing only our underpants, leaning on our elbows. Each girl leaned across a bed and kissed her best friend's father.
The girls rose to face each other. They began running their fingers through each other's hair, playing gently with it, letting it fall in strands from upraised fingers. They gazed fiercely into each other's eyes and made slight kissing motions at each other with their mouths. With absolute astonishment I watched as my beautiful young daughter and her friend entered an erotic ballet in which they lightly kissed, touched, and rubbed one another. They removed each other's dresses and bras. They presented each set of titties to the other and playfully rubbed their nipples together. They sensually removed each other's high heels and garterbelts, after which they slowly peeled each other's nylon stockings with their fingers and teeth, kissing skin as they went. I had no idea my daughter could possibly do such things. No girlfriend, not even a prostitute I had been with as a young man had ever brought me to the arousal I now experienced.
Now wearing only their panties, the girls mashed their bodies together, wrapped their arms and hands around each other's back and head, and kissed with greater endearment than in any classical Hollywood heterosexual love scene. Then they spun and came towards us. To my surprise, Andrea came toward me, while Melissa approached her father.
"Daddy, I want you to take them off," said Andrea, offering me her backside. "Do it," she insisted, her harsh voice cutting through me like steel.
Melissa also turned her back towards her father. Carbone and I had already removed our underpants and both had our cocks in our hands, with very busy agendas. We immediately interrupted our intense stroking to accommodate our beautiful daughters. Andrea rolled her palms across her nipples as I placed my hands on the delicate elastic of her panties. I pulled the elastic straight out toward me and played with it for just a moment, stretching it and wrapping my fingers inside it, running horizontally along its length, delicately grazing the skin along Andrea's hips and backside, savoring each second of time.
"Well? What are you waiting for?," said my bitchy little girl.
I pulled lightly on the fabric and inched it down. The crotch of her panties adhered with wetness and trailed behind the rest. I gently tugged at it, which brought a soft moan from my daughter's throat as it pulled at her tender pussy flesh. I then savored each inch of my daughter as I slowly brushed a trail down her legs with her panties. Raising her fluffy golden hair with both hands and letting it cascade down across her shoulders and back, my daughter deeply sighed with content and flexed her delicate feet as she stepped out of her panties, totally nude. Melissa had already been depantied by her father and was slowly running her fingers up and down the smooth flesh of her hips and waist, right before his eyes.
"Thank you, Daddy," said Andrea, with sarcasm in her voice. She squatted down for a moment in my lap, rubbing my penis with her firm teenaged buns, before moving to her best friend. In that too brief moment, it was all I could do to keep myself from raping her and coming instantly inside her, as my brain nearly melted. The girls met and french-kissed one last time at the edge of the bed, rubbing their flat lower bellies up-and-down and sideways together and cupping their breasts into each other's nipples.
Andrea joined Carbone on his bed and Melissa jumped onto my body, happily giggling like a little girl, with a naughty red face. She playfully pushed me into a prone position, still giggling, and took my penis in her hand, brushing it across the light wisps of black hair of her girlish mound.
"Fuck Andrea, Daddy," she shouted at her father, as she guided my penis into her own hole. Without pause whatsoever, she rode me like a little whore. I couldn't believe her absolute lack of modesty, nor that of my Andrea, who was now sucking Carbone's cock with delight, bathing it in her saliva and making loud smacking noises that could probably wake the entire hotel.
Moments later, Andrea too assumed a position astride Carbone, wildly hunching herself down onto his hard Italian cock. He thrust upwards into my beautiful Andrea like there was no tomorrow. I did the same to his little girl. Our daughters made considerable noise, laughing, gasping, moaning, squealing with teenaged joy. They only had eyes for each other most of the time, their faces thrilling to the fact they were fucking each other's Daddy. Eyes locked together, they started to play bobbing games, sometimes hunching in unison and sometimes in counter measure to each other, shrieking with sexual pleasure. The box springs loudly marked the cadence. Andrea started screaming at her best friend, "I'm gonna cum on your Daddy's cock! Tell him to fuck me harder! Now! Oh, yes. Melissa, your Daddy's gonna make me cum. Tell him to fuck me harder."
"Daddy, fuck her. Fuck as hard as you can, Daddy," Melissa screamed at her father. "Oh God, I'm gonna cum too. Fuck me, Mr. Tanner, I mean Jonathan. Fuck me."
"Daddy," said my wildly bouncing daughter, "Fuck her. Fuck her. Fuck her. Fuck her. Fuck her. Fuck her. Fuck her. Fuck her. Yes. Yes. Yes. Fuck her." My daughter then screamed with pleasure as she kept bobbing up and down.
Never in my life had I ever needed any less encouragement to fornicate. I pounded away at Melissa, wondering if my cock would suddenly appear at the opening to her mouth. I could hear Carbone's massive cock thudding hard and squishing, each time it hit the top of my own daughter's cunt, as she wildly impaled herself, uncaring about any permanent damage that could result. It was obscene and out of control. I suddenly found myself coming and thrusting my sperm up into young Melissa's squeezing and unsqueezing hole. My penis thrilled to the release and I wanted it to go on and on. Carbone was already near the end of his own exhausting cum in my Andrea, making the last of many deep guttural sounds in his throat. After my last squirt, Melissa held my penis in place inside her as she tried to catch her breath. She cupped her vagina with one hand.
Finally, things settled down. Both girls, paused for a moment, one hand resting on the abs of their best friends' gasping father.
"Melissa, are you ready?" asked my beautiful daughter, wiping the long sweaty strands of blonde hair from her face with her free hand.
"Yes, hold on till I get there."
With that, each girl raised up from the cock that had been spearing her and immediately and desperately cupped her own teenaged cunt with her other hand. They struggled to rush toward each other, between Carbone and myself at the joinder of our two beds. Carbone and I, though nearly spent from our few mad minutes of passion were craning our necks to watch, still hoping for more.
The girls immediately lay side-by-side, propped on an elbow, in opposite directions to each other, lifting their left legs straight into the air. With their free hand, they continued to cup their vaginas, retaining their precious liquid contents. When they had both settled in, each girl released her hand from her cunt, the other girl's mouth poised directly above. I watched with disbelief as my beautiful Andrea lightly dabbed, then wholeheartedly plunged her sweet pinkish tongue into her best friend's vagina and began ravenously devouring the load of sperm I had just delivered there. At the same time, with wet wagging tongue, Melissa heartily drank down her own father's semen from my daughter's pink shaven slit.
"Oh Daddy, it's so good," said Andrea between slurps. "I love your penis juice. I love the flavor of your sperm, Daddy."
"Um-hmh, Daddy," echoed Melissa to her own father, between slurps. "Umm, this is the best penis juice in the world."
The girls continued drinking from each other's vagina, slurping, sucking, smacking their lips, making contented hums deep in their young throats, shutting their eyes and shivering with pleasure as they swallowed, and producing the most obscene sounds I had ever heard as their tongues tapped noisily and wetly . When they had swallowed most of the precious elixir, they slurped up the remaining juices from each other's thighs and surrounding areas. Then, Andrea crawled onto Melissa, resting her full weight on her girlfriend and french-kissed her for a few golden moments, as Melissa's arms and legs locked around my daughter. Between kisses, the two nude girls seemed to whisper nasty things into each other's ears, over and over, as they giggled and squealed with sexual delight. I could only make out a few words, but I heard Andrea whisper to Melissa "So how many times are you gonna fuck your Daddy?" Then, Andrea suddenly turned her head to me.
"Can I have some more, Daddy? I want more juice."
"Melissa wants some more too, Daddy," said Melissa, turning her head to her father with a sweet, little girl voice. "Please Daddy, make some more penis juice for Melissa too," she purred. "Please. It's so good."
The girls rubbed their full bodies together, smothering their giggles with another kiss, trading the remaining juices in their mouths with the back and forth sucking of their tongues. I then watched with shaking disbelief as my lovely Andrea crawled over to me. Rising to her knees above me, she took my cock in her hand. I was immediately hard.
"Daddy, you've got to make some more penis juice for me. I want more," she said insistently.
"Andrea, what we're doing..."
"I want your juice, Daddy. I want it now. NOW!" With the insistent tone of a little bitch, Andrea cut off my last ditch stand to fight the tide of events that would change our lives forever.
She crawled beyond me on the bed, pulling me by my cock. I tried to kiss her but she avoided my mouth. I tried to touch her breasts, then caress her legs, as she tugged me towards her. She forcefully slapped my hands away from her body and turned onto her back. I tried to kiss her again but she loudly slapped my face, still holding my penis. She slapped me twice more in the face, very hard, still tugging on my penis. With it still in her hand, she craned her neck to look at it a moment, twisting it sharply back and forth. Then, she roughly jerked it down and placed it at the entrance to her pussy.
"I want your penis juice inside me, Daddy. Now."
I forgot all about Melissa and her Dad, although I could hear Melissa's soft voice: "Melissa's pussy wants to taste your penis juice too, Daddy. Fuck me." Seconds later the air was rent by young girl screams of delight from the other bed. I was lost in my own bitchy little girl's pretty pink pussy, that opened up to me like a flower. Andrea now had her hands behind her head, her legs stretched straight out and spread far apart in a wide "V", her feet flexed into sexy pointed toes. Her thick, golden wavy hair was draped all around her angelic face. My daughter looked proudly, almost defiantly into my eyes.
"Squirt me, Daddy. Promise me you'll squirt me as much as possible."
I was already a million miles past the point of no return. My daughter's intoxicating beauty had set me on fire. I wrapped my arms underneath my daughter's shoulders and entered her, fully. I began thrusting happily into her tight moistness, thrilling to my flesh melting with hers. As I pumped her, I stared right, then left, following the length of each smooth, upraised thigh with my eyes, all the way to her delicate pointed toes, beholding the loveliness of my daughter as she offered herself up to me so brazenly. The sweet pleasures of her pussy overtaking my senses, I now focused only on each instant of time as I plunged and boned into Andrea's very core, desperately trying to penetrate completely through her, to gut her alive with my cock. Each inward and outward friction was producing the most excruciatingly delicious feeling my penis had ever known. I would never in my life be able to get enough of this agonizingly wonderful fire in my cockhead as it sank into the forbidden teenaged depths of the heaven between my daughter's thighs. She soon got into the rhythm and wrapped her smooth legs around my back, trying to catch her breath between soul-shaking moans of joy, thrusting every bit of her young body back at me, with enough force to nearly lift me off. She repeatedly slapped the heels of her cute feet hard against the flesh of my buttocks, forcing me into her as she thrust wildly up against me. I couldn't believe her strength and power, as she rammed herself back against me, again and again and again. Suddenly, she started scratching my back and pulling my hair. Her beautiful face twisted in blissful agony. "Unh, Unh. Squirt, Daddy! Unh. Fuck me as hard as you can. Unh. Oh, Daddy. NOW! YES! Unh. Now Daddy, squirt your juice into me. Squirt me, Daddy. Squirt meee! Unh. Yes. Unh. Squirt me! Yes, oh yes, oh yes. Mmmmm. Squirt me, Daddyyyy."
Andrea was cumming long and hard, violently shaking her head sideways, her deep blue eyes rolled up their sockets. Her beautiful cheeks turned crimson and she gagged for breath. She was bathing my penis in her own wet honey-cum, basting my bloated cock with flood after flood of the sweetest pussy juice. Despite the thick syrup that suddenly came gushing warmly onto my pubic hair and balls, her teenaged hole held me tight. The air was thick with the rich, peppery scent of her deepest perfume. My penis was now making loud splats in her cunt. Suddenly, I felt myself fulfilling her urgent orders as squirt I did. From the intense pressure and delirious release, it felt as though a quart or more of rich juice was rushing with burning, intolerable pleasure from my balls, up the tube through the underside of my penis, squirting into Andrea's clenching and unclenching hole, jerking again, and again, and again, and again, and again. Her shattering screams of sexual ecstasy filled my head.
Finally, I rolled off my daughter and nearly passed out. After several minutes during which I mindlessly stared at one of the wooden beams in the ceiling, I reached for her but my hand only felt the warm pool of fragrant cum she had produced. Suddenly, I felt a jabbing finger in my ribs. It was Andrea who had picked up her green dress and shoes.
"Come to my room, Daddy," said my little girl with authority. "Well? Move it!" I slowly rose and started looking for my pants. In the background, I could still hear the urgent fuck sounds of Melissa and her father. "Daddy, come on. Now! This minute," she bitchily ordered. I staggered into my pants, grabbed my shirt, and followed Andrea, who was already padding down the hall in her bare feet to the room next door. She was still naked, pressing her dress and shoes against herself.
"Hurry up, Daddy. Here's the key. Open it."
I took her key and quickly opened the door, looking around for any late-night wandering guests. Fortunately, our suites were the only ones on the top floor. When we arrived in the room, my daughter came to me, gently took off my hastily hung attire and threw her arms around my waist, bending upwards on the tips of her toes to kiss me. We kissed softly. I could still feel the burn of the hard slaps she had given me before.
"Carry me to bed, Daddy."
I tenderly lifted and carried Andrea to bed and set her gently down. She opened the covers and I crawled in next to her and we cuddled, nuzzled, caressed, and gently kissed awhile. Then, we heated up again and spent the next several hours screwing intensively, each session followed by brief intermissions of quiet, tender kissing, never leaving each other's arms. She was beauty. She was rapture. She captured my soul. Finally, her head on my chest, Andrea spoke to me.
"I'm still mad at you, Daddy."
"I'm sorry baby."
"Sorry for everything."
"When I was little, you used to love me."
"I still do."
"No you don't. You're never around when I need you."
"I'm really, really sorry, baby."
"You don't even know me anymore."
"I promise you baby, I'll spend the rest of my life trying to make it up to you. I love you, Andrea, in every way. I know it's not saying much, or something you can understand about me, but since coming on this trip with you I haven't thought one time about my law practice. I love you that much. It's like everything just emptied out of me and I became filled with you. Only you."
"Does your penis love me?" she said in a pouting little girl voice.
"Yes, very much."
"Well, Daddy, your penis is going on trial for awhile until you pass the test. The 'Daddy test'."
"I promise, honey, whatever it takes; I'll make more time for you. I'll give up my practice. I'll retire. I'll change careers. We'll go away together. Whatever you want. I just want to be near you, forever and ever. Ever and ever and ever."
"Well, just let your penis know Daddy that you only get one chance at the 'Daddy test'. One chance. So don't blow it, Daddy."
Around 3:00 p.m. on Sunday afternoon, just as we were getting packed to return home, I received a phone call. It was Jennifer, my wife.
"How was your week-end, honey?" she asked.
"Oh, we're fine. I'm fine. Fine," I stammered.
"Did you and Andrea have fun?"
"Fun. Yes. It was okay, I guess. Well, you'd have to ask her if she did. Do you want to talk to her?"
"No, I'm just checking in with my sweet husband. You sound very relaxed."
"How did you know we'd be here?"
"Oh, it was sort of my little plan with Andrea."
"By the way, do you like the way she fucks? I certainly do."
"You mean, you and Andrea...?" "Yes, silly. How else do you think I've been able to take those long, lonely days and nights while you were busy at the office? After all, I didn't want to start cheating on you with a man. You know how oversexed I am. Anyway, now that you two are fucking, I hope that both Andrea and I can count on you joining us every week-end. By the way, Andrea wants us all to go to Europe this summer. She says it's part of your test. Something she calls the 'Daddy test'. Oh, and this winter she wants you to take her skiing in Aspen. Oh, and after that she wants you both to enroll in fencing classes. She thinks fencing is very classy. Don't you? And after that she wants us all to go on a world tour of the famous restaurants. Let's see, she wants you to buy a sailboat so you two can learn to sail together. After that she wants us all to...